Looking for a Home

I have been wrestling with my ecclesiastical, but not my Christian, identity for some time now. I was ordained in the United Methodist Church, because that is the church in which I was raised. We tend to remain with the familiar things, people and places in our lives, don't we? There was a time when my denomination and I fit well together. The UMC's historic emphasis upon social justice, inclusiveness and open-mindedness has always had immense appeal for me. We used to highlight John Wesley's so-called "quadrilateral" of scripture, tradition, experience and reason as the building blocks of faith. Then, some in the denomination lobbied to have that changed to scripture, first, with the other elements subservient, and the General Conference made it law. At first glance it makes perfect sense, doesn't it? Why would we not use scripture as our foundation for faith? Wesley knew that scripture alone meant little unless one framed it within the historic creeds of the church, the experience of both the worshiping community and the individual, and serious and studied reflection. My denomination has always made provisions for clergy who are unable to attend seminary to take course of study classes, originally by correspondence, and now through on-line access. But those were the exception, and candidates for ordained ministry were expected to attend theological school after college and receive a grounding in scriptural study, among other courses. My denomination sponsors thirteen graduate schools of theology in which to train clergy, including at places like Duke, Emory, Drew and Boston Universities. However, with more and more people choosing ordained ministry as a second career, folks receive training at whatever schools of theology are close to their homes. As a result, many clergy today were trained at schools reflecting divergent theological traditions that employ a literalistic understanding of scripture, something that historic Methodism never advocated. We have always taken scripture very seriously, as a guide for our religious and spiritual lives, but not as a prescription for a list of do's and don’ts. Thus, I find myself in a denomination in which I feel more and more like a stranger, seeing our historic emphasis upon social justice increasingly superseded by calls for "traditional family values" and "getting tough on crime" and "restoring God to government." Each of those phrases encapsulates a whole set of beliefs worthy of serious discussion, but instead of discussion, scripture passages are thrown around to justify a particular theological bent. At times, there seems to be little tolerance for discussion these days. So, I am looking around, trying to find an ecclesiastical home where I fit. I share this struggle with you because I know there are many folks who find that their religious beliefs sometimes don't line up with those of the majority. One can feel very much alone at times, and perhaps it helps to know that many of us are seeking to find a community that exemplifies the welcoming embrace that the gospels proclaim so forcefully. Serious Bible study yields not a list of forbidden activities, but instead, illuminates a way of life that has as its hallmarks justice, truth and welcome. One would think those elements would be most evident in our churches, but one might be disappointed. Blessings on us all as we make these journeys towards our theological homes.