Looking for Meaning

Whenever I read the passage from Mark 9:42-47,I am reminded of a terrible incident that happened in my hometown years ago. A young man, despondent over the breakup of his marriage, and high on drugs, took that passage literally. I won't recount here exactly what he did, but if you read the passage, you will get the idea. Several days after he mutilated himself, I was asked if I would agree to meet with his estranged wife and family, since I was serving a parish just a few miles away. I was working on my counseling degree at the time, but was not prepared for this situation, I assure you. I met with the family and they were horrified that "God would do such a thing" to someone. Getting past that unfortunate bit of theology took some time, and, near the end of the session, I realized what the real reason was for the family requesting a meeting with me. In his deluded state, the young man stated that he committed such an act of self-destruction because he wanted to go to heaven. It was what he said next that caused concern for his estranged wife and family: he wanted to take her to heaven with him. It was not my theological expertise (if one could call it that!) that they were seeking. They wanted some assurance that he could not come after his wife and harm her. Since he had been involuntarily committed to a psychiatric institute, I knew enough about state law at the time that I could assure them that he would not be getting out anytime soon. They breathed a huge sigh of relief and thanked me for my time. I was glad that the session was over, but I wished that they were as happy to know that God does not make people do such things as they were to learn a bit about the intricacies of mental health law. Then again, who could blame them? God's providential care may be most evident when it is understood in the context of actions that affect folks directly, for the better. I know that God did not will for that young man to disfigure himself in such a horrible way. But sometimes, we struggle to understand tragedy, and when we cannot understand, we attribute it simply to God's will. That seems to be more helpful in our minds than admitting to ourselves that we don't know why some things have to happen. In such an instance, God becomes the villain, instead of being the One who can be our comforter and advocate when we experience the tough times. Our sense of hurt and outrage may blind us to seeing God as anything other than an avenger when bad things happen. Perhaps if we can focus more on understanding God's presence as a constant in our day to day lives when things are going well, we will have built up the reserve of grace needed to get us through the tough times by believing that, though God did not cause the bad stuff, God remains with us as we go through it. Of course, if we insist on maintaining the attitude that God must not permit bad things to happen, ever, then there is no amount of reasoning that will suffice and we will refuse to be comforted.